Oh my gosh, Olive has become a biter and it is so scary because I know she’s teething so once that tooth pops out she’s going to bite my nipple off! Mums, how did you stop this?
P.s I have been the worst blogger lately, there are a thousand and one posts that need to go up which I will get to this week 🙏
Olive has started giggling, it’s the most beautiful sound I have ever heard! Is it possible to fall in love with a little human being every time I see her?!
I honestly feel so depressed and sad, I can’t believe I just knocked my babies head on the cupboard. During pregnancy and even after I gave birth I’ve been so scared that this would happen, I thought to myself that it’s inevitable that one of us would “hurt” her in some way of course without intending to do so, I knew the day would come but I wasn’t prepared. I’m sitting here crying feeling terrible but telling myself that this doesn’t make me a bad mum, I didn’t mean to do it and I wish I had moved differently so that wouldn’t have happened but it did and I can’t change it so what I have to do now is stay strong, keep an eye on her and take this as a learning experience! O didn’t even cry or anything, no bruises or bumps, no marks or noticeable changes in her behaviour, it all seems ok but I can’t help panicking anyway! Man…I feel awful, I can’t even describe it!
Gosh I really hate this part of being a parent, the constant worry that your child is or isn’t ok, the constant worry that there are things that can harm O- how do you parents handle this????
Olive just ate dirt!!! I was holding some potatoes and Olive is currently mouthing so she wants to put everything in her mouth, before I knew what was going on her mouth was on that potato and she looked like she enjoyed the taste! Initially I panicked but I dismissed the bad thoughts as quickly as they came because I’m sure she will be fine, I remember eating all sorts of things as a kid!
In other news, O ate banana for the first time today 🙌 Ok so I’ve let her lick my strawberries (which I’ve just found out should not be given to kids under 1 year…Whoops) and I’ve even let her put her mouth to my mugs of tea and hot chocolate which she really enjoys but this time it was proper eat eating, I was super excited to see her reaction and she LOVED IT, she could not get enough which made me so happy. I got a glimpse of what feeding times in future will be like, the messiness of it, and I expected her poop to stink but it actually smelt like banana 😂
I’m so excited for this whole new chapter so I can see her try things for the first time, how amazing is that?!
I love this girl- Happy Birthday NIKI!!!
Niki and I have been friends literally since day one and for the absolute longest time, from being in kindergarten just enjoying our lives to forming a “gang” in prepatory school and becoming some sort of bullies to parting ways to attend different secondary schools and universities although we always pick up where we left off whenever we see each other, our parents are also good friends which is great because were all always on the loop of whats going on in all our lives! We celebrated her birthday at Wasp & Sprout on sunday and it was such a lovely day, I am so glad that Olive got to meet her and also spend time with my other good and “old” friends! Props to Jireh who took her camera and got all these lovely shots of O with everyone, Thanks Ji!
Niki, you are such an amazing person, the sweetest of us all, thanks for such an epic day ❤
Olive got to go to her 3rd and 4th bloggers event on saturday- First we went to Zen garden to try out their new menu which was absolutely delicious and then we got to go to Tapas Ceviche bar where Dennis Prescott was giving a talk about “his craft how he started, answer questions and do a practical food and wine shoot”. Dennis Prescott is an amazing food photographer that I have followed for a while and I was super exited to meet him, naturally I asked him to take a photo with O for the blog!! At the end of the event, he had a little competition for the attendees where we had to take a picture of the food and the best pic won, i’m happy to report that I WON and I happily walked away with his new cookbook, Eat Delicious!
So I went out a few weeks ago I think about 2 or 3 and I drank myself silly. You know, I haven’t drank like that in a very long time and I honestly thought those days were kind of behind me but one thing led to another and I was wasted! Having said that, I had one of the best nights I’ve had in a very long time, started of at Muthaiga for fish bowl Friday’s then ended up at mercury and I really enjoyed my company, I really enjoyed the person I was, just generally it was an amazing night and I had a lot of fun but the next morning oh my gosh… Walalalalala 😵
Guys, I had a hangover for 3 days straight! THREE WHOLE DAYS!
I had not felt that bad since possibly giving birth!!! it was just the worst feeling I could even imagine and obviously now times have changed and I have a baby so taking care of Olive, especially the day after going out was insanely difficult, insanely! I actually still cannot believe how bad I felt and then on top of that had to take care of Olive the entire day, just the normal things like keeping her company, changing her diaper, feeding her, entertaining her etc became some of the hardest tasks I’ve ever had to do, I tried to the best of my ability to do all of it with a smile on my face and very enthusiastically so that Olive wouldn’t feel any differently, I was just dying inside! I felt so upset with myself and current situation, I was feeling so sorry for myself yet I had no one to blame but myself so I had to suck it up and do my mummy duties!
Having said all of that, imagine the hangover was not even the worst part- for an entire week straight I was in such a panic that I had made Olive “slow” by feeding her breastmilk with alcohol. I even took her to the doctors on 2 occasions to have her checked out, both times they said she was completely fine and healthy but I was convinced that I had done that. She seemed slower and more sleepy to me, I had even convinced myself that something had happened to her lip as I thought it looked like it was drooping then started to think I had given her a stroke somehow, though everyone- wayne, my mum & the doctors kept saying she was fine. I was going through a little depression thinking that I harmed my baby, I felt like the worst mum in the world!
I’m extremely happy to report that that whole saga is over and Olive is indeed a very happy and healthy baby, I guess you live and you learn and I really learnt, trust me 🙌
I can feel myself letting go of things…A LITTLE BIT! Let me explain;
I’m sure some of you can guess the type of mum that I am from previous posts and rants or on a personal level, but if you don’t know, I’m that super protective mum who wants to do everything for Olive on my own no matter how exhausted I might be, I am the one who carries her everywhere and makes sure she is safe, I squint and examine everyone who takes her from me always somehow feeling jealousy when she is out of my arms, the mum who doesn’t listen to people when they tell me I should put my baby down straight after feeding so that she learns not to sleep on me because I love the way she sleeps on me and feels so safe with me,or I’ll come running from any direction if I hear her cry, I take her along with me EVERYWHERE- every job I have or party I attend unless it’s a job or party that I can’t take her in which case I cry my eyes out and then only trust my parents, sister and mother in law to babysit her but even still I cry and worry so much! I could go on but I think you catch the drift?
I guess I could blame the way I am with Olive on being a new mum, so many people tell me that they go through or went through the same things and then there are also those mums who like to show you that your way of doing things isn’t the right way but let me not get into that… anyway what I’m trying to get at is that I can feel myself letting go a little, I know her so well that when she cries and its fake crying I find myself taking a pause and letting her try and calm herself down whereas before I would have grabbed her up in a second, I feel a little more comfortable with lots of different people holding her, I feel a little more comfortable even not being in the same room with her as I’m doing errands or doing some work whereas before she had to be insight at all times, I feel a little more comfortable with the idea of leaving her at home whereas this was unimaginable before, I am so happy that I am at this point because I feel more relaxed about Olive than before, relaxed in a sense that I know she’s ok (of course I still worry every single minute of every day that Olive is ok and nothing bad happens to her and I’m there always hoping she’s not unhappy but smiling all day), but you get what I mean yeah?